Courtroom Quotations

Post by **BlueGene** » Fri Jan 20, 2006 12:49 am

This is pretty funny.

http://rinkworks.com/said/courtroom.shtml

* Lawyer: "What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?"
* Witness: "Gucci sweats and Reeboks."

* Lawyer: "How old is your son, the one living with you?"
* Witness: "Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which."
* Lawyer: "How long has he lived with you?"
* Witness: "Forty-five years."

* Lawyer: "Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?"
* Witness: "No."
* Lawyer: "Did you check for blood pressure?"
* Witness: "No."
* Lawyer: "Did you check for breathing?"
* Witness: "No."
* Lawyer: "So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?"
* Witness: "No."
* Lawyer: "How can you be so sure, Doctor?"
* Witness: "Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar."
* Lawyer: "But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?"
* Witness: "Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere."

Post by **brisk** » Fri Jan 20, 2006 12:58 am

the last one is good, but it looks fake (even if the site says otherwise)

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Fri Jan 20, 2006 12:59 am

I've read a lot of them, many of which are way better than those.

Post by **BlueGene** » Fri Jan 20, 2006 1:00 am

There is more stuff on the site, some of them are pretty funny while others are kinda lame.

Post by **Chupacabra** » Fri Jan 20, 2006 1:34 am

pretty funny

Post by **mjrpes** » Fri Jan 20, 2006 3:33 am

The last one is awesome (if and only if it was real)

Post by **[xeno]Julios** » Fri Jan 20, 2006 6:09 pm

Lawyer: "When he went, had you gone and had she, if she wanted to and were able, for the time being excluding all the restraints on her not to go, gone also, would he have brought you, meaning you and she, with him to the station?"

Other Lawyer: "Objection. That question should be taken out and shot."