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nice timing from my company.
Posted: Tue Mar 21, 2006 11:41 am
by horton
i got home at about 7.30pm
check my email.
words to the effect of:
you have a presentation to make 1pm tomorrow.
its somewhere u dont know how to find, but good luck finding it.
if u do it well, and we get the contract its gonna be worth about $250k - $300 per year.
if u get the contract for us, we will suck your cock forever.
if u dont, we will have your balls on a fucking stick.
so at short notice, i have to either save a few people their job and make my company lots of cash. or i die.
fuck responsibility, i wanna be working at mcdonalds where the worst thing i can fuck up, is giving someone regular coke instead of diet.
Posted: Tue Mar 21, 2006 11:47 am
by axbaby
you'll do fine ..pretend everyone is naked and make sure to wear loose pants in case of stiffalitus
Posted: Tue Mar 21, 2006 11:51 am
by Don Carlos
have a wank before you go in. just make sure you aint got no man jam your your shirt/ear
Posted: Tue Mar 21, 2006 11:55 am
by horton
i think i shall use the tactic that has served me well in the past.
LIE. followed by sucking some cock. and a little more lying to follow.
due to the nature of the business, in a few months time if they discover i have been full of shit, its kinda too late to find someone else to award the contract to.
I dont plan to be working for the same company in 12months time, so if they get it this year, and get told to fuck off next year..i dont really care.
Posted: Tue Mar 21, 2006 12:36 pm
by duffman91
Confidence is key.
Posted: Tue Mar 21, 2006 12:46 pm
by axbaby
Don Carlos wrote:have a wank before you go in. just make sure you aint got no man jam your your shirt/ear
never ever go in a tubesteak full of baby batter .. wank i agree is 100% justified .. do it twice within 10 minutes you'll feel like a stud and that confidence will radiate throughout the room.
tissue 3 cents
good impression priceless
Posted: Tue Mar 21, 2006 1:01 pm
by Ryoki
You could consider walking up to those bastards, whipping out your unit right there and start flogging it furiously - all while you happily chatter away about businesslike things. It will confuse the hell out of them, and they'll probably try to defuse the alarming situation by agreeing with you 110% on everything, just to get you away from them faster.
Surely a win-win situation.
Posted: Tue Mar 21, 2006 1:18 pm
by dmmh
Posted: Tue Mar 21, 2006 1:29 pm
by Freakaloin
only morons have jobs...
Posted: Tue Mar 21, 2006 4:26 pm
by Underpants?
sounds like the stable, life-long career path of about everyone I know right now... life gets fucking weirder by the laundryload.
Posted: Tue Mar 21, 2006 4:32 pm
by Freakaloin
a career is a job that goes on too long...hence SUPER MORON ALERT!!!...
Posted: Tue Mar 21, 2006 9:40 pm
by YourGrandpa
Your wife works and keeps you around. Super Duper Moron Alert!!!
Posted: Tue Mar 21, 2006 10:04 pm
by andyman
The first thing you want to ask is, "Did anyone watch 24 monday? Was that a kick ass episode or what??"
you'll be fine once they know you watch 24.
Posted: Tue Mar 21, 2006 10:40 pm
by mik0rs
andyman wrote:The first thing you want to ask is, "Did anyone watch 24 monday? Was that a kick ass episode or what??"
you'll be fine once they know you watch 24.
Funny you should mention that, a friend of mine was going for a job as a field engineer and had to do a presentation. His presentation started off with him saying he wanted to be a field...
...agent, and showing a slide with Jack Bauer on it, apparently it got them on his side straight away. It got him through to the 2nd stage but he didn't end up getting the job, fucking genious idea though
Re: nice timing from my company.
Posted: Tue Mar 21, 2006 10:40 pm
by Guest
horton wrote:i got home at about 7.30pm
check my email.
words to the effect of:
you have a presentation to make 1pm tomorrow.
its somewhere u dont know how to find, but good luck finding it.
if u do it well, and we get the contract its gonna be worth about $250k - $300 per year.
if u get the contract for us, we will suck your cock forever.
if u dont, we will have your balls on a fucking stick.
so at short notice, i have to either save a few people their job and make my company lots of cash. or i die.
fuck responsibility, i wanna be working at mcdonalds where the worst thing i can fuck up, is giving someone regular coke instead of diet.
lol pussy, try operating on a deadline where failure means a bullet in your body.
Re: nice timing from my company.
Posted: Tue Mar 21, 2006 11:01 pm
by Big Kahuna Burger
Kracus wrote:horton wrote:i got home at about 7.30pm
check my email.
words to the effect of:
you have a presentation to make 1pm tomorrow.
its somewhere u dont know how to find, but good luck finding it.
if u do it well, and we get the contract its gonna be worth about $250k - $300 per year.
if u get the contract for us, we will suck your cock forever.
if u dont, we will have your balls on a fucking stick.
so at short notice, i have to either save a few people their job and make my company lots of cash. or i die.
fuck responsibility, i wanna be working at mcdonalds where the worst thing i can fuck up, is giving someone regular coke instead of diet.
lol pussy, try operating on a deadline where failure means a bullet in your body.
you are such a faggot
Re: nice timing from my company.
Posted: Tue Mar 21, 2006 11:02 pm
by feedback
Kracus wrote:horton wrote:i got home at about 7.30pm
check my email.
words to the effect of:
you have a presentation to make 1pm tomorrow.
its somewhere u dont know how to find, but good luck finding it.
if u do it well, and we get the contract its gonna be worth about $250k - $300 per year.
if u get the contract for us, we will suck your cock forever.
if u dont, we will have your balls on a fucking stick.
so at short notice, i have to either save a few people their job and make my company lots of cash. or i die.
fuck responsibility, i wanna be working at mcdonalds where the worst thing i can fuck up, is giving someone regular coke instead of diet.
lol pussy, try operating on a deadline where failure means a bullet in your body.
Try sex
Posted: Tue Mar 21, 2006 11:30 pm
by dmmh
fuck off strangler
Posted: Tue Mar 21, 2006 11:41 pm
by Chupacabra
andyman wrote:The first thing you want to ask is, "Did anyone watch 24 monday? Was that a kick ass episode or what??"
you'll be fine once they know you watch 24.
not sure if they care about 24 over in japan sir.
Re: nice timing from my company.
Posted: Wed Mar 22, 2006 1:03 am
by andyman
Big Kahuna Burger wrote:Kracus wrote:horton wrote:i got home at about 7.30pm
check my email.
words to the effect of:
you have a presentation to make 1pm tomorrow.
its somewhere u dont know how to find, but good luck finding it.
if u do it well, and we get the contract its gonna be worth about $250k - $300 per year.
if u get the contract for us, we will suck your cock forever.
if u dont, we will have your balls on a fucking stick.
so at short notice, i have to either save a few people their job and make my company lots of cash. or i die.
fuck responsibility, i wanna be working at mcdonalds where the worst thing i can fuck up, is giving someone regular coke instead of diet.
lol pussy, try operating on a deadline where failure means a bullet in your body.
you are such a faggot
Re: nice timing from my company.
Posted: Wed Mar 22, 2006 4:57 am
by ek
Kracus wrote:
lol pussy, try operating on a deadline where failure means a bullet in your body.
last time i checked you were a balding curry eating cocksucker?
