jailbate test

Open discussion about any topic, as long as you abide by the rules of course!

I'd hit it...

 
Total votes: 0

Ryoki
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Post by Ryoki »

bitWISE wrote:Now this is the kind of girl I would go to jail for:

Image

(note tnf, take it easy on me, she really isn't jailbate)
Say, what a pretty transvestite.
Giraffe }{unter
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Post by Giraffe }{unter »

Image
[url=http://www.dumpt.com][img]http://www.giraffe-hunter.com/images/dumpt.gif[/img][/url]
[size=85]DUMPT.com fully revamped, simple image hosting/dumping ground
No registration required![/size]
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Foo
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Post by Foo »

Iccy (temp) wrote:I love threads like this, you can tell who browses porn all day and who deals with real life women.
When a male dolphin is interested in you, about the only thing you can do, if you are male, is to masturbate him. (Unfortunately, I cannot speak for the female of the human species... it seems women just don't like dolphins enough... so I cannot say for sure if it is safe to mate with them. I would suspect not, due to a dolphins size, but then again, I cannot say for a woman.) WARNING! In the considerations of safety, you should NEVER let a male dolphin attempt anal sex with you. The Bottle-nose dolphin member is around 12 inches, very muscular, and the thrusting and the force of ejaculation (A male can come as far as 14 feet) would cause serious internal injuries, resulting in peritonitus and possible death. Unless you are the masochistic type, you will have a hard time explaining your predicament to the doctors in the emergency ward....

A male dolphin's member is roughly S-shaped, tapered at the end. If you are in the water with them, it is best to support the dolphin on his side, just under the water, with one hand, and handle him with the other. Male dolphins, I find, tend to prefer the base of the penis to be gently massaged and squeezed, as well as gently rubbed along it's length. It feels very much like the rest of the dolphin (ie. smooth and rubbery to the touch, but firmer). It doesn't take long for the male to ejaculate, around 40 seconds to a minute, and this is usually accompanied by either shuddering just prior to ejaculating, and thrusting and tail-arching during ejaculation. The force of ejaculation can be powerful at times, so it is best to keep your face out of the line of fire, or keep his member underwater. You can attempt to lick and suck on the end of it while masturbating as well, but be warned, do not try to give full throat, and get the hell out of the way before he ejaculates! A male dolphin could snap your neck in an accidental thrust, and that would be the end of that relationship.
"Maybe you have some bird ideas. Maybe that’s the best you can do."
― Terry A. Davis
andyman
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Post by andyman »

Foo wrote:
Iccy (temp) wrote:I love threads like this, you can tell who browses porn all day and who deals with real life women.
When a male dolphin is interested in you, about the only thing you can do, if you are male, is to masturbate him. (Unfortunately, I cannot speak for the female of the human species... it seems women just don't like dolphins enough... so I cannot say for sure if it is safe to mate with them. I would suspect not, due to a dolphins size, but then again, I cannot say for a woman.) WARNING! In the considerations of safety, you should NEVER let a male dolphin attempt anal sex with you. The Bottle-nose dolphin member is around 12 inches, very muscular, and the thrusting and the force of ejaculation (A male can come as far as 14 feet) would cause serious internal injuries, resulting in peritonitus and possible death. Unless you are the masochistic type, you will have a hard time explaining your predicament to the doctors in the emergency ward....

A male dolphin's member is roughly S-shaped, tapered at the end. If you are in the water with them, it is best to support the dolphin on his side, just under the water, with one hand, and handle him with the other. Male dolphins, I find, tend to prefer the base of the penis to be gently massaged and squeezed, as well as gently rubbed along it's length. It feels very much like the rest of the dolphin (ie. smooth and rubbery to the touch, but firmer). It doesn't take long for the male to ejaculate, around 40 seconds to a minute, and this is usually accompanied by either shuddering just prior to ejaculating, and thrusting and tail-arching during ejaculation. The force of ejaculation can be powerful at times, so it is best to keep your face out of the line of fire, or keep his member underwater. You can attempt to lick and suck on the end of it while masturbating as well, but be warned, do not try to give full throat, and get the hell out of the way before he ejaculates! A male dolphin could snap your neck in an accidental thrust, and that would be the end of that relationship.
cool, i didn't know that

:icon22:
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MKJ
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Post by MKJ »

wtf foo
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Foo
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Post by Foo »

Rollseyes says you did.
"Maybe you have some bird ideas. Maybe that’s the best you can do."
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SoM
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Post by SoM »

bitWISE wrote:Now this is the kind of girl I would go to jail for:

Image

(note tnf, take it easy on me, she really isn't jailbate)
isnt this the chick from

we swallow 5 or 6 ?
[color=red][WYD][/color]S[color=red]o[/color]M
Geebs
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Post by Geebs »

What this world needs is a version of photoshop men can run in their brains to get the same effect as all that touch-up they do in magazines.





No, wait, it's called beer.
reefsurfer
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Post by reefsurfer »

Giraffe }{unter wrote:Image
Yuck...skinny ugly wannabe kewl grunge bitch.
[FTF]Pyro
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Post by [FTF]Pyro »

reefsurfer wrote:
Giraffe }{unter wrote:Image
Yuck...skinny ugly wannabe kewl grunge bitch.
.,.... shut the fuck up



youd pump her, dont even try to say you wouldnt
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seremtan
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Re: jailbate test

Post by seremtan »

YourGrandpa wrote:
seremtan wrote: if you're gonna pick someone with big breasts who looks like they could be underage but isn't you could have picked someone actually attractive like felicity fey

FFS
You'd make a mess in your tighty whiteys if that girl even talked to you. Who are you trying to kid?
:olo: tough guy :olo:
mik0rs
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Re: jailbate test

Post by mik0rs »

[FTF]Pyro wrote:Image




its just a question if you could handle the time
Not ugly but not very nice looking, and she seems to have horrible tits.
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[FTF]Pyro
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Re: jailbate test

Post by [FTF]Pyro »

mik0rs wrote:
[FTF]Pyro wrote:Image




its just a question if you could handle the time
Not ugly but not very nice looking, and she seems to have horrible tits.
..... whats your point
Guest

Post by Guest »

Nerds with high standards so they can use that as a built in excuse as to why they are still virgins.
She's fucking hot and well worth a fuck.
mik0rs
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Re: jailbate test

Post by mik0rs »

[FTF]Pyro wrote:
mik0rs wrote:
[FTF]Pyro wrote:Image




its just a question if you could handle the time
Not ugly but not very nice looking, and she seems to have horrible tits.
..... whats your point
That she's not ugly but not very nice looking, and she seems to have horrible tits.

Are you fucking thick?
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mik0rs
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Post by mik0rs »

You also have no taste if that's what you like. There's another point.
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Dave
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Post by Dave »

She is one ugly sow
mik0rs
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Post by mik0rs »

Yeah mik0rs is right woo :icon14:
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Dave
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Post by Dave »

mik0rs is always right
andyman
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Post by andyman »

Foo wrote:Rollseyes says you did.
it felt weird....it went from jellyfish to cartilage in like 7 seconds
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Scourge
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Post by Scourge »

I'd pass on it.
mik0rs
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Post by mik0rs »

ctrlnuke wrote:Nerds with high standards so they can use that as a built in excuse as to why they are still virgins.
She's fucking hot and well worth a fuck.
Saying no to that is hardly "high standards", it's more along the lines of "a completely rational decision".
If we're going to generalise lets go with the alternative that some nerds will fuck anything that's not a complete troll and put down others for having some taste.
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Dave
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Post by Dave »

I added a poll
losCHUNK
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Post by losCHUNK »

fat, slim, pink, brown, under age, over age

all the same after a few beers
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Foo
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Post by Foo »

Also, Mike's built like a brick shithouse and gets ladies.

Hell, I'd be catcher for him any day :icon14:
"Maybe you have some bird ideas. Maybe that’s the best you can do."
― Terry A. Davis
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