Say, what a pretty transvestite.bitWISE wrote:Now this is the kind of girl I would go to jail for:
(note tnf, take it easy on me, she really isn't jailbate)
jailbate test
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Giraffe }{unter
- Posts: 2941
- Joined: Fri Mar 17, 2000 8:00 am
When a male dolphin is interested in you, about the only thing you can do, if you are male, is to masturbate him. (Unfortunately, I cannot speak for the female of the human species... it seems women just don't like dolphins enough... so I cannot say for sure if it is safe to mate with them. I would suspect not, due to a dolphins size, but then again, I cannot say for a woman.) WARNING! In the considerations of safety, you should NEVER let a male dolphin attempt anal sex with you. The Bottle-nose dolphin member is around 12 inches, very muscular, and the thrusting and the force of ejaculation (A male can come as far as 14 feet) would cause serious internal injuries, resulting in peritonitus and possible death. Unless you are the masochistic type, you will have a hard time explaining your predicament to the doctors in the emergency ward....Iccy (temp) wrote:I love threads like this, you can tell who browses porn all day and who deals with real life women.
A male dolphin's member is roughly S-shaped, tapered at the end. If you are in the water with them, it is best to support the dolphin on his side, just under the water, with one hand, and handle him with the other. Male dolphins, I find, tend to prefer the base of the penis to be gently massaged and squeezed, as well as gently rubbed along it's length. It feels very much like the rest of the dolphin (ie. smooth and rubbery to the touch, but firmer). It doesn't take long for the male to ejaculate, around 40 seconds to a minute, and this is usually accompanied by either shuddering just prior to ejaculating, and thrusting and tail-arching during ejaculation. The force of ejaculation can be powerful at times, so it is best to keep your face out of the line of fire, or keep his member underwater. You can attempt to lick and suck on the end of it while masturbating as well, but be warned, do not try to give full throat, and get the hell out of the way before he ejaculates! A male dolphin could snap your neck in an accidental thrust, and that would be the end of that relationship.
"Maybe you have some bird ideas. Maybe that’s the best you can do."
― Terry A. Davis
― Terry A. Davis
cool, i didn't know thatFoo wrote:When a male dolphin is interested in you, about the only thing you can do, if you are male, is to masturbate him. (Unfortunately, I cannot speak for the female of the human species... it seems women just don't like dolphins enough... so I cannot say for sure if it is safe to mate with them. I would suspect not, due to a dolphins size, but then again, I cannot say for a woman.) WARNING! In the considerations of safety, you should NEVER let a male dolphin attempt anal sex with you. The Bottle-nose dolphin member is around 12 inches, very muscular, and the thrusting and the force of ejaculation (A male can come as far as 14 feet) would cause serious internal injuries, resulting in peritonitus and possible death. Unless you are the masochistic type, you will have a hard time explaining your predicament to the doctors in the emergency ward....Iccy (temp) wrote:I love threads like this, you can tell who browses porn all day and who deals with real life women.
A male dolphin's member is roughly S-shaped, tapered at the end. If you are in the water with them, it is best to support the dolphin on his side, just under the water, with one hand, and handle him with the other. Male dolphins, I find, tend to prefer the base of the penis to be gently massaged and squeezed, as well as gently rubbed along it's length. It feels very much like the rest of the dolphin (ie. smooth and rubbery to the touch, but firmer). It doesn't take long for the male to ejaculate, around 40 seconds to a minute, and this is usually accompanied by either shuddering just prior to ejaculating, and thrusting and tail-arching during ejaculation. The force of ejaculation can be powerful at times, so it is best to keep your face out of the line of fire, or keep his member underwater. You can attempt to lick and suck on the end of it while masturbating as well, but be warned, do not try to give full throat, and get the hell out of the way before he ejaculates! A male dolphin could snap your neck in an accidental thrust, and that would be the end of that relationship.
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reefsurfer
- Posts: 4065
- Joined: Sat Mar 08, 2003 8:00 am
Re: jailbate test
YourGrandpa wrote:You'd make a mess in your tighty whiteys if that girl even talked to you. Who are you trying to kid?seremtan wrote: if you're gonna pick someone with big breasts who looks like they could be underage but isn't you could have picked someone actually attractive like felicity fey
FFS
Re: jailbate test
Not ugly but not very nice looking, and she seems to have horrible tits.[FTF]Pyro wrote:
its just a question if you could handle the time
[img]http://www.zen85869.zen.co.uk/img/mik0rsSig.jpg[/img]
Re: jailbate test
..... whats your pointmik0rs wrote:Not ugly but not very nice looking, and she seems to have horrible tits.[FTF]Pyro wrote:
its just a question if you could handle the time
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Guest
Re: jailbate test
That she's not ugly but not very nice looking, and she seems to have horrible tits.[FTF]Pyro wrote:..... whats your pointmik0rs wrote:Not ugly but not very nice looking, and she seems to have horrible tits.[FTF]Pyro wrote:
its just a question if you could handle the time
Are you fucking thick?
[img]http://www.zen85869.zen.co.uk/img/mik0rsSig.jpg[/img]
Saying no to that is hardly "high standards", it's more along the lines of "a completely rational decision".ctrlnuke wrote:Nerds with high standards so they can use that as a built in excuse as to why they are still virgins.
She's fucking hot and well worth a fuck.
If we're going to generalise lets go with the alternative that some nerds will fuck anything that's not a complete troll and put down others for having some taste.
[img]http://www.zen85869.zen.co.uk/img/mik0rsSig.jpg[/img]


