Detachable Penis

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phantasmagoria
Posts: 8525
Joined: Wed Oct 22, 2003 7:00 am

Detachable Penis

Post by phantasmagoria »

I woke up this morning with a bad hangover,
and my penis was missing again.
This happens all the time.
It's detachable.
This comes in handy a lot of the time.
I can leave it home when I think it's going to get me in trouble,
or I can rent it out when I don't need it.
But now and then I go to a party,
get drunk,
and the next morning I can't for the life of me
rememberwhat I did with it.
First I looked around my apartment
and I couldn't find it,
so I called up the place where the party was,
they hadn't seen it either.
I asked them to check the medicine cabinet
coz for some reason,
I leave it there sometimes,
but not this time.
So I told them if it pops up
to let me know.
I called a few people who were at the party,
but they were no help either.
I was starting to get desperate.
I really don't like being without my penis for too long.
It makes me feel like less of a man
and I really hate to have to sit down every time I take a leak.
After a few hours of searching the house
and calling everyone I could think of,
I was starting to get very depressed,
so I went to the Kiev and ate breakfast.
Then as I walked down Second Avenue toward St. Mark's Place,
where all those people sell used books and other junk on the street,
I saw my penis lying on a blanket next to a broken toaster oven.
Some guy was selling it.
I had to buy it off him.
He wanted 22 bucks,
but I talked him down to 17.
I took it home,
washed it off,
and put it back on.
I was happy again.
Complete.
People sometimes tell me I should get it permanently attached,
but I don't know. Even though sometimes it's a pain in the ass,
I like having a detachable penis.
[size=85]
phantasmagoria
Posts: 8525
Joined: Wed Oct 22, 2003 7:00 am

Post by phantasmagoria »

:icon14:
[size=85]
andyman
Posts: 11198
Joined: Wed Feb 09, 2005 8:20 pm

Post by andyman »

My sex-change operation got botched

My guardian angel fell asleep on the watch

Now all I got is a Barbie Doll-crotch

I got an angry itch



Six inches forward and five inches back

I got a

I got an angry itch



I'm from the land where you still hear the cries

I had to get out to sever all ties

I changed my name and assumed a disguise

I got an angry itch



Six inches forward and five inches back

I got a

I got an angry itch



Six inches forward and five inches back

The train is coming and I'm tied to the track

I try to get up but I can't get no slack

I got an angry itch, angry inch, angry itch



Six inches forward and five inches back

I got a

I got an angry itch



A long story short:

When I woke up from the operation

I was bleeding down there

Bleeding from the gash between my legs

My first day as a woman

And already it's that time of the month

But two days later

The hole closed up and the wound healed

And I was left with a one inch mound of flesh

Where my penis used to be

Where my vagina never was

A one inch mound of flesh

With a scar running down it

Like a sideways grimace

On an eyeless face

It was just a little bulge

It was an angry itch



Six inches forward and five inches back

The train is coming and I'm tied to the track

I try to get up but I can't get no slack

I got an angry itch, angry itch, angry itch



Six inches forward and five inches back

Stay undercover 'til the night turns to black

I got my inch and I'm set to attack

I got an angry itch, angry itch, angry itch





aces
corsair
Posts: 972
Joined: Fri May 18, 2001 7:00 am

Post by corsair »

butthole?
SOAPboy
Posts: 8268
Joined: Sun Apr 13, 2003 7:00 am

Re: Detachable Penis

Post by SOAPboy »

phantasmagoria wrote:I woke up this morning with a bad hangover,
and my penis was missing again.
This happens all the time.
It's detachable.
This comes in handy a lot of the time.
I can leave it home when I think it's going to get me in trouble,
or I can rent it out when I don't need it.
But now and then I go to a party,
get drunk,
and the next morning I can't for the life of me
rememberwhat I did with it.
First I looked around my apartment
and I couldn't find it,
so I called up the place where the party was,
they hadn't seen it either.
I asked them to check the medicine cabinet
coz for some reason,
I leave it there sometimes,
but not this time.
So I told them if it pops up
to let me know.
I called a few people who were at the party,
but they were no help either.
I was starting to get desperate.
I really don't like being without my penis for too long.
It makes me feel like less of a man
and I really hate to have to sit down every time I take a leak.
After a few hours of searching the house
and calling everyone I could think of,
I was starting to get very depressed,
so I went to the Kiev and ate breakfast.
Then as I walked down Second Avenue toward St. Mark's Place,
where all those people sell used books and other junk on the street,
I saw my penis lying on a blanket next to a broken toaster oven.
Some guy was selling it.
I had to buy it off him.
He wanted 22 bucks,
but I talked him down to 17.
I took it home,
washed it off,
and put it back on.
I was happy again.
Complete.
People sometimes tell me I should get it permanently attached,
but I don't know. Even though sometimes it's a pain in the ass,
I like having a detachable penis.
King Missle FTW!
[size=75][i]I once had a glass of milk.

It curdled, and then I couldn't drink it. So I mixed it with some water, and it was alright again.

I am now sick.
[/i][/size]
[img]http://img162.imageshack.us/img162/3631/171164665735hk8.png[/img]
Grudge
Posts: 8587
Joined: Mon Jan 28, 2002 8:00 am

Post by Grudge »

pensi
CaseDogg
Posts: 3481
Joined: Sat Mar 01, 2003 8:00 am

Post by CaseDogg »

i aint heard that song in for ever.
+JuggerNaut+
Posts: 22175
Joined: Sun Oct 14, 2001 7:00 am

Post by +JuggerNaut+ »

yar, it's as old as us :(

me even.
Keep It Real

Re: Detachable Penis

Post by Keep It Real »

phantasmagoria wrote:I woke up this morning with a bad hangover,
and my penis was missing again.
This happens all the time.
It's detachable.
This comes in handy a lot of the time.
I can leave it home when I think it's going to get me in trouble,
or I can rent it out when I don't need it.
But now and then I go to a party,
get drunk,
and the next morning I can't for the life of me
rememberwhat I did with it.
First I looked around my apartment
and I couldn't find it,
so I called up the place where the party was,
they hadn't seen it either.
I asked them to check the medicine cabinet
coz for some reason,
I leave it there sometimes,
but not this time.
So I told them if it pops up
to let me know.
I called a few people who were at the party,
but they were no help either.
I was starting to get desperate.
I really don't like being without my penis for too long.
It makes me feel like less of a man
and I really hate to have to sit down every time I take a leak.
After a few hours of searching the house
and calling everyone I could think of,
I was starting to get very depressed,
so I went to the Kiev and ate breakfast.
Then as I walked down Second Avenue toward St. Mark's Place,
where all those people sell used books and other junk on the street,
I saw my penis lying on a blanket next to a broken toaster oven.
Some guy was selling it.
I had to buy it off him.
He wanted 22 bucks,
but I talked him down to 17.
I took it home,
washed it off,
and put it back on.
I was happy again.
Complete.
People sometimes tell me I should get it permanently attached,
but I don't know. Even though sometimes it's a pain in the ass,
I like having a detachable penis.
white people :paranoid: :paranoid:
andyman
Posts: 11198
Joined: Wed Feb 09, 2005 8:20 pm

Post by andyman »

riddla wrote:fucking ween :lol:
WeeN Rules :icon32:
Keep It Real

Post by Keep It Real »

andyman wrote:My sex-change operation got botched

My guardian angel fell asleep on the watch

Now all I got is a Barbie Doll-crotch

I got an angry itch



Six inches forward and five inches back

I got a

I got an angry itch



I'm from the land where you still hear the cries

I had to get out to sever all ties

I changed my name and assumed a disguise

I got an angry itch



Six inches forward and five inches back

I got a

I got an angry itch



Six inches forward and five inches back

The train is coming and I'm tied to the track

I try to get up but I can't get no slack

I got an angry itch, angry inch, angry itch



Six inches forward and five inches back

I got a

I got an angry itch



A long story short:

When I woke up from the operation

I was bleeding down there

Bleeding from the gash between my legs

My first day as a woman

And already it's that time of the month

But two days later

The hole closed up and the wound healed

And I was left with a one inch mound of flesh

Where my penis used to be

Where my vagina never was

A one inch mound of flesh

With a scar running down it

Like a sideways grimace

On an eyeless face

It was just a little bulge

It was an angry itch



Six inches forward and five inches back

The train is coming and I'm tied to the track

I try to get up but I can't get no slack

I got an angry itch, angry itch, angry itch



Six inches forward and five inches back

Stay undercover 'til the night turns to black

I got my inch and I'm set to attack

I got an angry itch, angry itch, angry itch





aces
wack
Locked