Fuck 'em.

Hi. This is LOuie. It seriously is me. Im even going to leave
the O stuipdly capatalized because who would pay an intern to do
that?? Okay so you bought the thing with my fat face on it and
you clicked the button that said i could email you. And i know
that now you are thinking "aw shit. Why'd i let this guy into my
life this way?". Well dont worry. Because i really swear it that
i wont bug you. I will not abuse this privalage of having your
email. You wont hear from me again... Probably, unless i have
something new to offer you. The reason i'm writing now, in the
back of a car taking me to the Tonight Show set, is to let you
know that as of now there is some new and cool stuff on my site,
related to Live at the Beacon Theater. Theres a thing where you
can download and print a dvd box cover and label so you can burn
and make your own dvd of the video. And theres a new option where
you can gift the special to as many people as you want (for 5
bucks each) and they'll get a nice gifty email from you with a
link to the video.

Also, some of you may know, i recently made a statement (that
sounds so dumb. Like i'm the president or something) about how the
video has been doing online. Im pasting it in here below in case
you missed it.

Lastly I'm planning to put some more outtakes of the show on
youtube and i think i will put one on the site that is only
available for free to you folks on this list, who bought the
thing and opted in. But dont hold me to that because really i
just thought of it and typed it.

Okay well please have a happy rest of the year and more happy
years after that. And please even have been happy in your past.
What?

Thanks again for giving me 5 dollars. I bought 3 cokes with it.

Regards. Sincerely, Actually,

Louis

Hello there. I am Louis C.K. for now. You are a person who opted into my email list, when you bought my Live at the Beacon standup special. As I promised, I have left you alone for a long time. Well, those days are over. I am writing now to let you know that I am offering some more stuff on my site, which you are more than welcome to buy. What does "More than welcome" mean? Well, it means you can totally buy this stuff. Like, totally.
Okay so there are two new products. They are both audio comedy specials. One is called...
Louis CK: WORD - Live at Carnegie Hall
This is about an hour long and it's a recording of a live standup show that I did at Carnegie Hall in November of 2010 as part of a national tour I was on entitled "WORD" I've had a lot of requests from people to release that show as a speical or as a CD. I hadn't done so because a lot of the material that I did on the WORD tour, was in the second season of my show "LOUIE" on FX. But I decided since it's never been released as an entire show, and some of the material was not on my show, I'm releasing this now. I'm giving you this long and boring explaination because, as most of you know, I release about an hour or more of new standup material every year and folks can count on seeing a new show every year. This is old material, so I don't want to be a dick and pretend it isn't.
Anyway, Louis CK: WORD - Live at Carnegie hall is available for the same 5 dollars as everything will be on louisck.com. It is the same deal as before that you get 4 downloads and the file is drm free. YOu can burn it onto a CD, play it on your ipod, whatever you want. The special is broken up into separate tracks because I think that's more fun for a comedy album, but they are all just one thing you buy all at one time.
The second new thing is even older, actually. It's an audio release of "Shameless", my very first hour long standup special that I did for HBO. It was never released as an audio CD, so I asked HBO to let me offer it on this site and they agreed. They also agreed to let me offer it, the same as the rest, DRM free, for 5 dollars. Obviously I'll be sharing the Shameless money with HBO but I think it's pretty cool that they're letting this be out there unprotected like this. Shameless is also 5 dollars, drm free, and you can download it a bunch of times for the price.
Lastly, I'm offering Live at the Beacon Theater as an audio version, for those many of you who have asked for it. This is just exactly an audio version of the video special. Those of you who have already bought Live at the Beacon theater already own this. If you just return to the site louisck.com with your password, it is now live and available for you to download at no extra cost. Those of you who now buy LIve at the beacon theater for 5 dollars, will also have the audio version availbable to you. It's simply been added to the video downloads and streams you already were getting.
Later, I am going to make a version of Live at the Beacon theater, that is a separate audio special, which will be much longer. That will cost money. Because I'm an asshole. But that's later.
Also later, actually soon, I'll be putting my first feature film "Tomorrow Night' up for sale on the site. And also other things. Soon. For now. Please feel free to click on the button below, to purchase some of the new stuff, using Paypal or Amazon payments, we now accept both. Or go to louisck.com and peruse the new items. I think we have some samples there that you can check out.

You may have noticed that Louis CK LIve at the beacon theater is airing on the FX network. FX agreed to air it 10 times over the next few months. The version on FX is only 42 minutes long and we had to take out the fucks. The reason I chose to air the special on FX is that FX is my people. They gave me my show LOUIE (season 3 premieres on June 28th at 10:30pm) and they have never aired a standup special. So I thought it would be cool to let them air it and bring more people to the site who want to get the complete unexpurgated version. Also FX doesn't make me cut things for content. Just the big words (fuck, etc)

Okay. that was exhausting. Sorry. I didn't even ask you how you are. How are you? Oh yea? Oh good. That's great. What? Oh man. That's tough. I'm sorry... Oh well that sounds like you handled it well, though. So. Yeah. Yeah. I know. I know that's... yeah. Well... Just remember, time will go by and that'll just be on the list of shit that happened to you. You'll be okay. Yeah. Huh?... Oh. Really? HE DID? Oh my GOD! hahaha!! That's CRAZY! No. no. I won't tell him you told me. Of course not. Alright well... uhuh? Oh wow. yeah. Alright well.. I really gotta go. Thanks for listening. I'm glad you're basically okay. Stay in touch.

your friend,

Louis C.K.

hello folks! I'm going on tour this year from October through
Feb. I'll be all over the goddamn place. This year, I'm trying
something new, building on the fun, success and fan-benifit of
selling my content online. We are selling tickets to this tour
exclusively here on louisck.com. I only wanted to do this if
there was a way, like with LIVE AT THE BEACON, that it could
bring the price of tickets down and make them easier and less
complicated to buy. We figured out a way.

Making my shows affordable has always been my goal but two things
have always worked against that. High ticket charges and ticket
re-sellers marking up the prices. Some ticketing services charge
more than 40% over the ticket price and, ironically, the lower
I've made my ticket prices, the more scalpers have bought them
up, so the more fans have paid for a lot of my tickets.

By selling the tickets exclusively on my site, I've cut the
ticket charges way down and absorbed them into the ticket price.
To buy a ticket, you join NOTHING. Just use your credit card and
buy the damn thing. opt in to the email list if you want, and
you'll only get emails from me.

Also, you'll see that if you try to sell the ticket anywhere for
anything above the original price, we have the right to cancel
your ticket (and refund your money). this is something I intend
to enforce. There are some other rules you may find annoying but
they are meant to prevent someone who has no intention of seeing
the show from buying the ticket and just flipping it for twice
the price from a thousand miles away.

Some of these rules may be a pain in your ass, but please be
patient. My goal here is that people coming to see my shows are
able to pay a fair price and that they be paying just for a
ticket. Not also paying an exhorbanant fee for the privalege of
buying a ticket.

Tickets across the board, everywhere, are 45 dollars. That's
what you'll actually pay. In every case, that will be less than
anyone has actually paid to see me (after ticket charges) in
about two years and in most cases it's about half of what you
paid last year.

The benifit for me is that I won't get angry emails from anyone
who paid a ton of money to see me due to circumstances out of my
control. That makes me VERY happy. The 45 dollars also includes
sales tax, which I'm paying for you. So I'm making more or less
depending on the state.

Another benifit to me is also one to you. I get your email
address (if you opt in) when you opt in. You don't have to join
ANYTHING to buy these tickets and if you opt in, youll only hear
from me once in an old man's jizz-cycle.

Obviously none of this means anything if the shows aren't good.
So that's up to me. As I do every year, I'll be performing a
brand new hour (or more) on all of these shows.

Lastly, it was a real challenge to find venues around the country
that could work with our exclusive ticketing service under these
perameters. It means I'm playing in very new places. I really
appreciate all of these theaters that are letting us give this a
try.

Setting up this tour has been fascinating and difficult. this
ticketing service is a brand new thing and I really fucking hope
it works and that there aren't any problems. If anything comes
up, please be patient.

Doing things this way means I"m making less than I would have
made if I did a standard tour, using the usual very excellent but
expensive ticketing service. In some cities I've had to play
smaller venues and do more shows. But I like doing more shows
and about a year ago I reached a place where I realized I am
making enough money doing comedy so the next thing that
interested me is bringing your price down. Either way, I still
make a whole lot more than my grandfather who taught math and
raised chickens in Michigan.

alright, that's it, folks. I'll be sending this message out to
folks on the opt-in list and sending a separate email that lays
it out much more simply with the proper links. I am doing this
because when I emailed you about LIVE AT CARNEGIE HALL, (which is
still on sale for 5 dollars!) about half of the people who got
the email really enjoyed the long, verbose, unedited message.
The other half HATED it and would have preffered a price, a link,
and me shutting the fuck up.

This way, you can read this if you like, or your can just see the
massive shit-ball of text and throw it in the garbage, and focus
on the simple email.